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Word Candy by Lueki


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Submitted on
March 11, 2009
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The old man sits with stooped back.
The room is cold, just like his hands.
Thoughts have wandered like small children.
He wonders if he will see home again.

Thoughts have wandered home again,
with stooped backs and cold hands.
The room sits with the old man.
Like small children, he wonders if he will see cold.

Back stooped with thoughts, he wanders.
Like a child the small room sits, wondering.
Home again is cold.
The old man will see with his hands.

Thoughts have wandered with stooped backs.
The cold hands sit with the old man.
He wonders if he will see like small children.
The room is home again.
A cubism poem!
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Daily Deviation

Given 2011-04-05
Dementia by ~fadedmannequin is "a cubism poem" about a point we may all reach someday. ( Featured by GwenavhyeurAnastasia )
:iconsmita13:
smita13 Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2014
I like the interesting structure - first time I've ever seen something like this.
Reply
:iconabbymeyer:
AbbyMeyer Featured By Owner May 9, 2013
An incredible poem even without the clever structure! :)
Reply
:iconmomo-madness:
momo-madness Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012   Writer
this was beautifully intellectual. i thoroughly enjoyed every bit of it. xox
Reply
:iconjasmineu2:
JasmineU2 Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011
Beautiful </3
Reply
:iconianthedino:
IanTheDino Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
This is the most amasing poem ihave read in my life. Congrats on the DD. ISee why.
Reply
:icontroubled-water:
Troubled-Water Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2011   Writer
I was not familiar with this type of writing before. It greatly surprised me, in a good way, of course!
Reply
:icon2-minutes-behindxx:
2-Minutes-BehindxX Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011
AMAZING.
Reply
:iconjellymansid:
jellymansid Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2011
goosebumps
Reply
:iconvalentinascreama:
ValentinaScreama Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
Fantastic! I've never heard of cubism poetry before, but it seems really interesting. Congrats on the DD, you certainly earned it :)
Reply
:iconnordiclynx:
NordicLynx Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I really like how this is written. My grandfather has got Alzheimers, and it is impossible to understand what he is thinking about
Reply
:iconxxstolen-soulsxx:
xxStolen-soulsxx Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
very interesting.
Reply
:iconmidnight-music:
midnight-music Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Artist
Wow. Just....wow. I love the format and the repetition, and I especially love the second stanza. This is just perfect, and it capture the sentiment perfectly. Congratulations on the DD!
Reply
:iconhcafantastic:
hcafantastic Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
memories of my father.
thank you.
Reply
:iconragdollian:
ragdollian Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
I love the last line, it really closed up the poem. I volunteer at an Alzheimer's facility so I know what dementia patients and their relatives go through, and it is a heart-breaking one. Sometimes I just sit there and think about how the brain functions, it's really quite interesting.
Reply
:iconopticalchaos123:
OpticalChaos123 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
:fuzzydemon: awsome
Reply
:icontwinkleprincess3108:
twinkleprincess3108 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
This poem is amazing and truly captures that aura of that dementia casts-- struck me on a pesonal note and the cubism aspect is wonderfully puzzling. It honestly felt like you were showing me a picture of a person~
Reply
:iconlightybug:
Lightybug Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
Wonderful poem <3 My grandmother had severe dementia and my other grandmother has Alzheimer's. Means a lot and it is extremely well written.
Reply
:iconnumbskulled00:
numbskulled00 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
My Grandfather died of Alshiemers- very deep and meaningful poem,thanks
Reply
:iconk47454k1:
K47454k1 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Professional Writer
If they keep picking devitions like this, I'll be reading DDs again! >_>
Reply
:iconstadiumlove:
StadiumLove Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Student
fantastic!
Reply
:iconmetalwaya:
metalwaya Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Very nicely done...reminded me of my grandfather, though.
Reply
:iconanbmjj:
anbmjj Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I wish I was smarter to understand this more. That being said, this is very intriguing. :)... maybe its cause theres music blasting... I cant read/ think about what I'm reading with sounds. :[
Reply
:iconenteringmymind:
enteringmymind Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
WOW, no wonder why this received a DD!! What a Fantastic poem!!:)
Reply
:iconnewbatteries:
newbatteries Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
jesus christ, this is great.
Reply
:iconaviiceruleanskies:
AviiCeruleanSkies Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Student
this is great. I love the last line :)
Reply
:iconloving-daughter:
Loving-Daughter Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Very touching poem. Well written.
Reply
:iconsandzen:
sandzen Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011   General Artist
Nice work.

I did a cubist haiku series myself, if you'd like to have a look: [link]
Reply
:iconbrainfissure:
BrainFissure Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
This is well done. I just wish the DD person hadn't reminded me that most of us become senile. I have all too vivid memories of seeing others with dementia as it is.
Reply
:iconrebeccalongart:
RebeccaLongArt Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Student Digital Artist
What a lovely poem. I unfortunately have had too much experience with dementia in family members lately, so I understand this poem really well I think.
Reply
:iconlo536:
Lo536 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
... I'm speechless.

Bravo. The concept seems so interesting; I've never heard of a cubism poem. Cubism, yes, but never such an interesting piece of writing like this.

C: I just don't know what to say. I can say, though, that this DD was earned. I applaud you. :clap:
Reply
:iconachimstyle:
Achimstyle Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Professional
That is quite nice.
Reply
:icononfireprojects:
onfireprojects Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
deserves the DD.. congratz!
Reply
:iconamyemaloney:
amyemaloney Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011   Traditional Artist
This is beyond words.
Reply
:iconcynicalanimal:
cynicalanimal Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
the effortless flow is brilliant and all the more enchanting with an ending so warm and cold at the same time...
Reply
:icondeadmenkil:
Deadmenkil Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
this poem definitely touched me and thats hard to do to me honestly. im not an open person when it comes to emotions but i felt this poem.
Reply
:iconmuffinbob:
MuffinBob Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Wow! This is really something. Congrats on the DD!
Reply
:iconopalcrane:
OpalCrane Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
The final stanza is particularly potent
but could not be so
without its predecessors
Reply
:iconladydoom:
LadyDoom Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Really outstanding :) This poem captures the concept of dementia in such a beautifully chilling way. Well done and congratulations on the DD!
Reply
:iconmilkchii:
MilkChii Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
:O I never heard of cubism poems!
I like it a lot :D
Reply
:iconpursuingthecerberus:
PursuingTheCerberus Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Professional Writer
absolutely genius.

I actually assist a dementia patient once a week, driving her to the store, pharmacy, etc.

It is an awful, awful disease which destroys the persons life. I see it first hand every Friday.

Excellent poem. Truly captures the fog, the confusion...

Congrats on the DD
Reply
:iconkaiverta:
kaiverta Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Artist
Oh wooow. My mother works in a Dimentia unit and specializes in people who are really as far gone as you can go whilst still 'alive', so I know from her what it's like and how stressful it must be for the sufferers.

I think you've captured it well in this poem. It expresses the endlessly small cycle in which Dimentia-sufferers are stuck; from forgetting where you are, why you're there, forgetting where home is, then remembering it; then forgetting a little bit more, and remembering a little less than last time, until finally, you are where you are in that exact moment, but you're not who you are.

I like this a lot. Congrats on the DD. Definitely deserved.
Reply
:iconkabya19:
kabya19 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
My god...It's like reading my own future thoughts.
Reply
:icondejavooo:
Dejavooo Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Congrats on the DD, a great piece!
Reply
:iconsmacintyre:
smacintyre Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
This hits home.
I may have already experienced the beginnings of this once or twice.
It terrifies me.
Reply
:icontobaeus:
Tobaeus Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011   Writer
This is pretty epic. Congrats on your DD. ^_^
Reply
:iconfractaleyes:
FractalEyes Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
It's somewhat pantoum-like; I love it.
Reply
:iconmetadored:
Metadored Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Stunning piece of work, every line holds it's own....and for me, packs a punch! Congratulations on your very much deserved DD :iconcarameldansenplz: :iconnewhugplz:
Reply
:icondumblikeamoose13:
DumbLikeAMoose13 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Incredible. I've never heard of this kind of poetry! I wanna try!
Reply
:iconchibixgunner:
ChibixGunner Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
This is delightful <3
Reply
:iconstako:
stako Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
A well-deserved DD. Great job!
Reply
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